More CL fun

saw this yesterday:

FREE STUDIO BASSIST (S. Burbs)
There will be a fee, if it takes hold
I have access to a studio in Orland Park
Please leave contact info, I will contact ASAP
Thanks
Zappa

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A cuppla weeks ago I answered a different post by this twat and he started to go on about a magnificent opportunity to join a band where he would start out as the guitarist and musical director but morph to being the manager and only take 20% but he had a vision, man, of what music to do and many connections to get gigs and …

I interrupted to establish he was talking about a cover band and said, “I’m not …”

He hung up.

Now, a more cruel dude would contact him about a potential bass gig paying, say, $250 a song (a believable amount guaranteed to gi’ him a boner) and then string him along for a minute before hanging up in the middle of his response …

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Fun with CL “Musicians Wanted” spammers

So a tw** posted this ad, follered by our emails:
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Singer/guitarist seekingHello!
I play guitar, percussion, keys, and vocals.
That’s right; I play vocals.
And I’m hoping you’ll help my YouTube cover tune get to 300 views (aka “go viral”).
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ydqurXfnmWM

If you don’t like it, there are 26 other videos on my channel. Please watch them all. And tell all your friends.

Thank you.
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Me:
Spam sucks, and so do you.

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Him(?):
Hmmm… no links. Just as I thought.
Some “real musician.”
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Him(?):
Seems a little hypocritical, considering that spam is all your e-mail is to me.

Here’s an idea: why not send links to some of your musical work instead, so as to prove your superiority and self-proclaimed right to judge mine?

Or you could just keep on yakkin’. Because that’s all people like you do, “M.E.V.”
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Me:
You didn’t ask for other’s music, speaking of hypocrisy.

You simply spammed a forum for musicians to connect.

BTW, I didn’t bother to listen to your music – I’m not interested in your spam-product.

Oh, and I’m glad you are annoyed now, just as you wasted my time and annoyed me and other real musicians-seeking-musicians, not spammers-seeking-attention.

Thanx for the laughs, genius; have fun playing with yourself.
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Him(?):
Your “real musician” cred died as soon as you sent your first e-mail. What real musician – in a city the size of Chicago, no less – has time to comb the Craigslist ads and send e-mails in response tnd some CL ads deleted. But I honestly don’t recall one single e-mail like this, before yours. Lots of e-mails asking about my availability to play; lots of compliments from around the country. But only one purported “real musician” who takes time to rail on something that he himself admits he knows nothing about.

At least I’m doing something positive. You’re just a loser; a nobody with no music to offer, or even a name.
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Me:
And you’re just a spammer, with the intellect of a childish one at that. (I figure you to be between 14 and 20, without a social life but a very encouraging mommy who is proud of her little musician, she surely is. Now, keep trying to grow that beard and lose some weight and use deodorant and maybe a girl will talk to you for more than 2 minutes, and I don’t mean your mom.)

Anyway. good luck with your music “career” and your craving for attention and your ego and your used-Kleenex habit, you total rock-star, you; I’ll not tease you anymore as it’s clear you’re too dumb to get the message, even as you admit CL has already deleted your worthless spam on multiple occasions.

Don’t look for any further response from me, either, as you are just too boring to be worth any further effort.

On the other hand, …

… nah, you’re just too boring.
===============================


carpal diem!

THD
vlayman
blog
vlayman.bandcamp.com
thehungrydrunx.bandcamp.com

Craigslist ads, answered

Looking for reggae musicians to jam with (Oak Lawn)

I’ve been reading through these posts and I can tell that none are a right fit for me, if people aren’t talking about what awesome gear they have, how much experience and the like… I use to play in a band in my teens, I’ve been playing guitar since then and I’m 30 now. I’m not saying I’m amazing, or even that I’m horrible also definitely not a beginner. I do want to play though, preferably in a reggae band, no instruments but you know how to play? No problem, I have a bass and what I believe is a good and loud enough bass amp, I also have a drum set, I play guitar myself but if need be I’m willing to pick up the bass. I work a Monday through Friday job and usually have to do some things after work so my day doesn’t end until around 7pm, two jam sessions a week would be cool, I know a lot of people want to play originals, well I’ve tried that and I’ve found I have a lot more fun playing covers, besides for people that I’ve never played with before I think covers would be better to learn first as a band and then work on any original work. With that being said, I like all types of music, I know a lot of people say that but I really do, but the music I like the most is reggae. I enjoy the culture, the bands and the positive message it usually tries to put forth. So hopefully there is some like minded people out there, bands that im currently listening to are Slightly Stoopid, of course Marley, and a bunch of other bands that I honestly don’t feel like listing out, if you like reggae, good people well at least me, smoking, dabbing, and just jamming hit me up.

I can play guitar or bass but looking for
bassist if any takers
keyboard
singer
drummer is iffy, I have a friend who plays drums but not sure if he’s down to play
=====================================================

Oh yep, reg Cool gay

————————————————————————————————————————

Drummer wants band

Drummer ,older looking for Eagles,Doobies ,Journey,Boston,type band, you know the good music of the 70’s not the bullshit ones.Not looking to sit in a garage and jam, or get ready for your one big block party gig.Good equipment (because I can afford it) the right attitude (because I’ve been there) Transportation ( because people always seem to ask that…Duhh I own a vehicle) try to be a professional (practice at home come prepared) and on time.If you’re a serious band,(and not a bunch of dipshits) let’s talk. Thanks

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Oh yeah it would help if yer also a arrogant twat like me …


MOONSHINE HOLLER BAND IS HIRING NEW LINEUP (SOUTH)

MOONSHINE HOLLER IS AUDITIONING PLAYERS FOR NEW LINEUP FOR FALL AND 2017 . SEND CONTACT INFORMATION FOR A LIVE AUDITION, NAME , PHONE NUMBER , AND WHAT INSTRUMENT YOU PLAY , AND SOMEONE WILL GET BACK WITH YOU . THANKS AND GOOD LUCK !

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GEE, I WONDER IF THEY ARE A HIP-HOP BAND ….!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Far south suburb guitarist looking for other musicians to form band.

Like the title states. I’m an experienced guitar player looking for other musicians to form a group with in the far south suburbs. The atmosphere will be laid back with no egos causing friction among others. I have a day job, and this will be to have fun and make good music, with some cash on the side for gigs we do. Also, the gigs will be paid, or we don’t do it (of course there are a “few” exceptions like a cancer benefit and such). Classic rock to modern radio hits that gets people singing along and dancing that everyone knows without the same songs every other band plays. Contact me if you’re interested
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Yeah, man. I dig what the title states. The fact that you are in Peotone and that is over an hour travel and two counties south of city center super-qualifies you for “far south suburbs” – I love yer understatement. And yer so macho and  firm that we, “will be laid back with no egos causing friction among others” because, I am sure, that will be yer job, aiight. Altho’, please I know we’ll  make some shite music, too, what you will prob’ly want to. Lotsa gigs, right?  And yeah, we need big money except for the benefits we’ll do, like for “Our Guitarplayer Is a Twat Anonymous”. And I’m glad you narrowed it down to, “Classic rock to modern radio hits that gets people singing along and dancing that everyone knows without the same songs every other band plays” because I know exactly what you think I might think you don’t know what you mean. So, this is me, contacting you, like, I’m so fucking interested


Baptist Church Organist Available (Northwest Indiana)

Experienced Baptist Church Orgaqnist Available.

Church musician for many years.
Dependable, and professional,

I teach choirs, and play the Hammond Organ.
Contemporary as well as traditional, and hymns.

If your Church is in need of an organist / Min. Of Music.
please reply to this posting via email.
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Please don’t ask me what’s a “Orgaqnist “, and why I’m suddenly available, and I jes’ wanna say that little boy is a liar …



carpal diem!

THD
vlayman
blog
vlayman.bandcamp.com
thehungrydrunx.bandcamp.com

Tuesnite jammage

So we playt with the new guitarist (me and the drummer, and in the musical, not the Ainglish, sense) a cuppla nights ago.

It was a totally interesting jam.

The guy is very good, not great, but he can play over anything.  Great laid-back personality, very musical. My only issues are temporary.  He owns a HRDX and a a Peavey Classic 30 (came with a new AmStandard Tele, what he handed to me to play – very refereshing from guys who act like yer asking to feel up their wife to try their axe).

He came with the Peavey and a Blues driver, no other effects – says he doesn’t use ’em.  But he listened to my suggestions and said he’s willing to use ’em, just never has.  My feeling is, in a power-trio, you are Clapton/EVH/Page, or ya use effects.  You know, delays, chorus, flangers, etc., at least occasionally.

He can play bass, also, altho’, IMNSFHO, I’m better at both – I’m definitely more aggressive as a player – I drive, he kinda follows, at least this time.

But he follows very well, and that’s what made it such a interesting jam.

I used cheat-charts from my 2014 project, and a cuppla Hungry Drunx charts, and basically had Mark (the drummer) start a beat, or I started playing the  note/chord notations from the paper, just using those and the lyrix as a guide to improvise the songs.

The results were spectacular.  In that manner we did nine songs, plus two improv’d songs (1 instrumental) and a version of a Hendrix choon I called, “Voodoobortion”.

We fuckin’ RAWKED!

We are better together this way then when I played guitar with Bob the bassist – my vocals are better when I play bass, and I can lead the song, also.

We don’t have a name yet, but me at 56, the drummer at 58, the new guitarist (Tom) at 65, I do believe we have a logo:

delso

99.114.245.241

carpal diem!

THD
vlayman
blog
vlayman.bandcamp.com
thehungrydrunx.bandcamp.com

Muso ads of the weak – headline edition

From today’s Craigslist:

Lyracist looking for band or beats
Must be able to help me with spelling …

starting b-sides rock band need guitar bass vocals
After which we can try and learn some actual hits …

guitarist wants to push the envelope with competent band mates
After which, we can try to make some music …

Guitar player looking for group or act
After which, we can try to make some music …

ladies, lets make a fucking punk band!!!
After which, we can let them try to make some music …

Let’s suck together
After which, we can try to make some music with a group or act or a fucking punk band!!…

Hip Hop
After which, we can try to make some music with a group or act but no fucking punk band!!…
Groin

carpal diem!

THD
vlayman
blog
vlayman.bandcamp.com
thehungrydrunx.bandcamp.com

Jes’ some gear-porn

Comparing some OD’s – the ones I didn’t mount. & a new verb, too.

Amp stackage

While I’m at it:

carpal diem!

THD
vlayman
blog
vlayman.bandcamp.com
thehungrydrunx.bandcamp.com